Casper the Yellow Ghost

Ok I'm a total asshole.
Dudesly makes like a parakeet. Just throw a blanket over him and he's out like a light.

Zambies

Jason has shown me the recipe that the bush men use to get the ladies: sexy/sassy/suggestive shirt, tie dye, wild look in the eyes, and of course big crazy knife. This look also works in parts of Staten Island.

Beer Stealer

I love when the drunkest dudes at the party, the ones that try to steal your beer or yell PARRRTYYYY and create a dancefloor, simply can't understand why everyone isn't in full party mode like he is. Then, approximately 20 minutes later, he is guaranteed to be passed out somewhere. His 120 lb hipster body becomes dead weight, and he isn't moving unless you want your floor covered in vomit. Then I take pictures of them. I tried to pose him but he woke up- and tried to swipe my beer. Yes.

Ehhhhh Bruno!

Bruno loves to take the ferry from Staten Island into the city to party! he's sometimes in such a hurry to party, that he carelessly forgets to wipe his face after eating a nice sandwich on ciabatta bread.
Ew ew the curly lips ew

Fans of David Blaine

Dude, if I was camping out to watch David Blaine in a suspended gyroscope for 3 days, I'd definitely surrender fashion for function and NOT wear jeans which expose my entire thigh. But you know what, the spotlights just MIGHT catch a glimmer of that alabaster skin, and David, suspended high above Times Square may see that flesh, and feel purpose in his antics. Thank you torn jeans girl, for showing us the way.

Purse Rack

I remember in like, the 90s, dudes in the hardcore scene would always try to get their chicks to "hold my Groundwork/Earth Crisis/Brother's Keeper hoodie while I go in THE PIT". To which I'd ALWAYS reply "Dude, I'm not a coat rack" And although this is a shitty pic, this reminded me of that, as Purse Rack happily held his girlfriends handbag while she danced like a slut on a go-go box. Awww!!

The Teacher Doubled

So initially, I was sent this photo of this cheesy fro dude on the subway by guest jerk hunter, Jesse. Haha I says. Then I went out Friday night to one of those places where they have a stage on the dancefloor, you know so all the cheesiest people can get up there and sing along to everyone else? So there was SubwayFro's Twinsy, who I nicknamed The Teacher. For EVERY song, he "mouthed along", and I say mouth instead of sang along, because dudeman didn't know ANY words, he just kind of looked like a vantriliquist doll. Anyway, he'd be all mouthy and point his finger to his temple, like "THINK ABOUT THIS, PEOPLE"..and I thought about it. I thought long and hard about what The Teacher may be trying to convey to me.

Bad Art

Today's special Sunday edition of Laughing at Jerks highlights a rising contemporary artist, fresh on the New York Scene. Note the rich application of paint and Impressionist style in the whimsical piece with two tomatoes soulfully playing saxophones in a lush meadow. Feel the artist's escapist notions as three hot air balloons, adorned with music notes, carry away three sets of men boxing... and then the Piece de resistance, the tomato and beatnik sax jam..what does this say about our society today? What does it say about produce? Is there a place for beatniks and tomatoes alike in this harsh cruel world?

So Coy

I hate when you're on the subway and you're next to someone who looks at themselves in the reflection of the subway doors the whole time, and makes faces and stuff. And its worse when you're across from someone who just discovered a) their camera phone or b) their face and they pose and pose and take pics of themselves over and over while you watch helplessly. What will be next? Coy? Surprised? Sexxxy? Kill me. I had to watch this guy do just that from like 34th Street all the way to Queens.

To Kelly from Justin, With Love

Dude in the background is prancing around what he thinks is the sexually ambigious dude from American Idol- you know, the one that made that AMAZING beach movie??

Tonto

Can you believe Tonto made fun of ME?

Real thing

I KNOW! But which one of them is REAL?

Oompa

What you can't see is that this Spanish music star's pants are not only made of multi colored felt, but they curve out drastically much like the panatloons of an Oompa Loompa. And a matching jacket. But the crowd went wild.

Slipping Away

Dude was passed out in the middle of a raging party. After a trip to the beer fridge, we couldn't find him. It seems he slipped ever so slowly down the hostess's sateen comforter and nestled nicely in a corner, with his head lodged between the bed and a rack of records. He stayed like this for at least 30 minutes. I only stopped taking pictures because my motor skills were getting shotty.

McJerks

This one is more making fun of myself, rather than this dude takin' a little cat nap turtle style, because I documented the fact that I was actually in a McDonald's for the first time in many years. Eating a dollar sundae alone.

Hot Pockets

So my camera on my new phone isn't that great. But I watched this lady eat an entire box of frozen Hot Pockets across from me, then a container of sweet potatoes which she *shudder* licked instead of using a spoon.

SNL theme song on acid

And just imagine what they sound like!

American?

These pics were sent to me by Craig. I'm assuming they are most likely of his best friend. The photo collection was quite extensive, a step by step of this dude stumbling in the streets of Osaka, like a typical American tourist. And of course wearing shorts. Craig also included a close up of this dude's wang, thanks for that Craig. It quickly replaced my "Every time you lie, God kills a kitten" wallpaper.

Identical Cousins

"Dude, I love bro-ing down with you. It's like bro-ing down with myself"
"I know EXACTLY what you mean."